Would you like to be able to successfully address interpersonal challenges, collaborate effectively 360 degrees and foster others’ best thinking? In this case, you need what we refer to as Actionable Approaches to People Problems. At the foundation of Actionable Approaches is being present and aware so that you are able to choose how to respond rather than just react as if you were on “auto pilot.”
Being aware means being aware of your own feelings and needs in any given situation, being aware of the other person’s feeling and needs, and focusing on a desired outcome for a particular conversation. Being aware doesn’t mean, however, that you have to know everything. For example, there is an Actionable Approach to address an issue with a colleague for which you don’t have an answer, and give constructive feedback, and improve your team’s effectiveness.
You ask, what exactly are Actionable Approaches? They are the proven tools for addressing just about any workplace situation. You can even apply them to your spouse, teenagers, or toddler!
First, the Win-Win Conversation is a five-step process for coming to an agreement, key elements of which are:
- Stating fact neutrally, avoiding loaded words and judgment
- Being aware of your own feelings and needs about the situation
In addition to workshops and a workbook, we now offer online courses that feature Actionable Approaches. If you look at our packages, you’ll see that you can combine our Win-Win conversation and Coaching Skills eLearning workshops or get them separately (at a New Year’s discounted price through February 11th!)
If any of your New Year’s resolutions happen to be related to becoming a better communicator or teammate or if you’re determined to become more effective, productive and known for your strengths, look at the sample page from our Win-Win Conversation online workshop below and see if it’s right for you. We wish you good luck in the New Year!
Sample page from the Win-Win Online Workshop:
Definitions of Goals and Strategies
- A goal is what you are trying to accomplish.
- A strategy is how you get there.
There are often many strategies that you can utilize to achieve a particular goal or satisfy a need. To identify a solution that works for both of you, you must identify the goals and needs at stake and then focus on a strategy that meets both parties’ goals and needs.
Example: Working it out
Read the example of Working it Out and consider the goals, strategies, and how the needs of both Joe and Tom are met.
Tip 52: Ask Good Questions
Use good questions to help filter the goals and needs of a situation from the possible strategies for achieving the goals. Do this before you focus on potential solutions or strategies to resolve a situation. This increases the chances of an efficient and effective process by creating a collaborative dynamic as well as reassuring both parties that their needs are important and will be met.
Tip 53: Shift The Dynamic
You don’t have to be the nominative leader to use the foregoing technique. Use questions to focus colleagues on goals any time the goals are unclear, communication is unproductive, or when people seem defensive or closed to others’ suggestions. You have the power to shift the dynamic by asking good questions.
Tip 54: Pause And Reflect
Introverts tend to “pause” more readily, especially if they also prefer Feeling Judgment and Perception. Introverted Feeling Perceivers are hard-wired to check in with their values and determine how they feel. Introverted Thinking Perceivers will pause to check in with their Thinking Judgment, that is, analyze accordingly. Pausing can be a challenge for Extraverted Judgers and Extraverted Sensing Perceivers because they are hard-wired to be in action. Preferences aside, all Types benefit from pausing to reflect and then making a deliberate choice to respond in a Win-Win manner.
Tip 55: Clear The Air
If you know you tend to avoid conflict and let issues fester, you may have to push yourself to respond so that you can clear the air. Feeling Judgers are more likely to experience avoidance unless they are practiced at confronting issues. Feeling Judgers tend to be motivated to address conflict in order to preserve the relationship. INFPs and ISFPs are often most challenged in this regard because they prefer the inner world and, when extraverting, prefer to “go with the flow” rather than confront issues. Thinking Judgers typically are more comfortable addressing objective issues such as the failings of another’s work product than deeply emotional issues.